When you're learning something, have you ever gotten the feeling you're learning it all wrong...?
Like, maybe you're just not seeing it from the right point of view or something...
It happened to me... when I decided to do volunteer work, that I found someone who seemed perfect, more than anything I'd ever seen before and even though it seemed as if he had many imperfections and even though he's only human... against all odds my heart was as stubborn as a 5 year old trying to do something he felt was right even though my mind kept telling it not to be so foolish...
And the time came when I though I shouldn't even have been there in the first place, and I questioned myself and finally the reasons why I was there from the start and I suddenly realized... I was learning the wrong lesson... I wasn't there to fall in love... to do what I was doing... what got me there in the first place was love... the most important thing in the world... and it was an old man, one of the persons I admire the most the one who reminded me the reason my world was bigger... the reason why I was there; it wasn't falling in love, it was giving love, unconditionally, selflessly...truly and with joy. It is then when I learned a new lesson, and sadly I realized yesterday that my stubborn heart is not the only one around... that there are others that just like it happened to me...are in the process of realizing they've been learning the wrong lesson all along...
Lesson learned:
Pay attention...you might be learning the wrong lesson
Losing a friend...
You lose a friend... when you want to lose it... when your will power is not strong enough to endure things like distance and deceit...
When you love a friend so much it makes your heart cry when you're away from them, and you feel as if many things around you moved because they were there... and when they're gone... the world seems to stop moving and all you seem to hear is your heart cracking...
When a friend is gone you may think you've lost him but there will forever be a ray of hope inside that will always wait for him to come back...so that your world starts moving again as it used to.
When you love a friend so much in makes your heart cry when they lie... no matter if it is simply to hide something... to avoid your grieving heart from crying... or to make you believe something you know it's not true, there will always be a ray of hope inside that will always wait for them to change it... and to be as they are... with their pride and other things... no matter what, you'll always be there...
You lose a friend...when you want to lose it...
If your heart endures distance and deceit... it will forever be an open place for happiness to nest.
Lesson learned is:
Friends and foes come and go, it's up to you to keep them or let them go.
Have you ever felt poisoned?
I don't mean anything snake related... unless we think of people as snakes (even though I think some people might have been one in a previous life).
What I mean is...
After learning from many people how to love at all times, after sharing with children who would give it all in exchange of a kiss and a hug, after living so many things that have taught me that the world is bigger than me, that there are so many things in life that matter so much more than selfish happiness, and that when you see in the eyes of a child your world can become bigger, in seconds...
After all that... I felt poisoned...
poisoned by a person who loves me, someone who's always there for me... but I had failed to notice she was more than depressed, or if I had not failed to notice, I had failed to care... perhaps, selfishly believing time would heal a wound that was deeper than the most terrible... forever hurtful wound of losing a child.
Right after talking to her and hearing the pain inside... my heart shrank, became bitter, sad, and dead... it felt... poisoned...
And the lesson learned was:
Poison is contagious...
You need to get the poison out
without hurting others...
Time does heal...
if you allow to hear.
